The link above is an article all about "things guys ALWAYS lie about to their girlfriends." There are pictures included just in case the boldly titled explanations don't make you paranoid enough. In case you decided not to click on the link, let me delight you. This article suggests that ALL men ALWAYS lie that strippers don't "do anything" for them, they don't visit pornographic websites, they don't think you look fat in that, they love you too, they don't think of your friend like "that," and the list goes on. Articles like this...excuse my language...but really piss me off. (Sorry, readers! There goes .03% of my lady likeness.)
This article suggests that:
1.) All men are the same.
Correction: Some men are the same. Some are not. If all men were the same, wouldn't finding the love of your life be SO much easier? Women, don't we get frustrated when we are categorized with Slutty Sally and her BFF Cheating Chelsea? Maybe that's just me, but all of both genders are NOT "the same."
2.) Regardless of the foundation of your relationship, your man is lying to you about some of the most hurtful things. Correction: We as women search for a certain individualism in a relationship. I believe Rihanna calls it feeling like the only girl in the world. Though I'm not a fan of her wording, she gets the point across. We search for that man that makes us feel like and tells us there is no one else. Haven't you heard the term, "the one?" There's a reason Hallmark cards don't congratulate readers on finding "one of the ones." No one wants to be one of the ones. We want to be the one. So, of course, being told that your man thinks Cheating Chelsea is a hottie with a body and fantasizes about her isn't exactly the most assuring of statements.
And 3.) Men are hopeless. Men are men. They will always be men. They will always think the way men think and do the things men do.
Wrong. Correction: You guys know that phrase, "boys will be boys?" Do you know the difference between a boy and a man? I do. It's not just a level of maturity. It's the fruits of the spirit. It's the mind set. So, maybe boys are hopeless. Maybe boys are boys and boys will always be boys. Maybe so. But a man? Well, he has a little thing called self control (which is a fruit of the spirit, see how that works?) He doesn't fantasize about Cheating Chelsea. He might catch himself looking and but he quickly distracts himself because of his self control.
This article nearly excuses this behavior simply because of gender. Aaron and I went through premarital counseling and we were assigned specific books to read. One of the books I read explained the way that men think and then explained the way that your future husband should handle this thought process. We know men are visual and we are well aware of why they like it when we wear that specific red dress. (He doesn't care what color it is, ladies...we know that. 😉) This book explained that to me in a way that terrified at me at first. I came into premarital counseling freaking out that Aaron was checking out every single woman that walked by. Luckily, we had a terrific premarital counselor who just so happened to understand the male thought process (since he is, in fact, male) and he managed to calm me down. I learned that men can distract themselves and that this thought process isn't some kind of pleasure, it's a struggle. It's part of their fallen nature. (Thanks a lot, Adam and Eve. 😒)
So, to whoever wrote this article, no. Men do not ALWAYS lie about these things to their significant others. There are those that do and those that don't. Men are not hopeless and do not have this hidden agenda of infidelity. They are visual beings that struggle every single day. And to the men that used to be boys and are now men, thank you. Thank you for not being hopeless. Thank you for no longer being boys. And thank you for being living proof that this stereotypical article is false.
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