Sunday, January 26, 2014

19 Reasons Why I Still Need My Bestie Even Though I'm Married

We have been warned of the struggles that will come along with hanging out with unmarried friends after you're married.



"They don't understand."
"They don't get it."
"They're not as mature."
"They aren't as prioritized."
"They'll tempt you to do 'single life' things."



While these statements are somewhat wise and are good things to remember, they aren't necessarily true. I think that it's become normal in our society to categorize being single with drinking and partying and staying out late. In which case it would be very unwise to spend a lot of time with your "single friends" after marriage. For me, that's not the case. You see, I understand that my husband is my best friend. He's awesome and fun and we tell each other things we can't tell anyone else. BUT I still need my "bestie." Here are my reasons.



1.) She gets me.
There are things that she understands that no one else does or ever will. Like why I think it's funny and ironic that that "one person" did that "one thing" while everyone else is like, "What's so funny?"

2.) She is a woman.
This can be affiliated with number 1. Aaron is probably the most understanding man I've ever met, but he's still a man. He doesn't understand why it's okay to skip out on your "diet" that time of the month. She does.



3.) She shares with me.
It's like doubling your wardrobe really. I can't wear Aaron's clothes, though. 

4.) We've been through it.
There are things I experienced with her before I ever even thought about dating Aaron. So, she understands when issue A affects issue B which then adds up to issue C. You know?



5.) She speaks my language.
Don't get me wrong, Aaron is definitely becoming fluent in Bronisms, but she's been speaking the language a later longer. This involves adding "ish" and "ly" to the ends of nouns in order to turn them into adjectives. It makes sense if you don't think about it.



6.) Our moods have been synchronized.
Most women know that when you start to spend a lot of time with another girl, everything slowly starts to synchronize. This puts your mood swings at the same place and time and simply eliminates any egg shells that might be walked on.

7.) We cry and laugh about the same things.
Aaron and I do not have the same emotional capacity because he is male and I am female. I won't get into that. But she and I cry and laugh about the same situations and at the same things. This makes judgement much easier to pass.



8.) Our morals are on the same level. 
This isn't so much a comparison to Aaron because he is a very well moraled man. But when it comes to girls these days, it seems to be rarer and rarer. We can both understand how any circumstance or outfit would offend the other because it will offend both of us. 

9.) We can communicate with looks.
Need I say more?




10.) We've developed a rare kind of telepathy.
It starts simply with something as small as finishing a thought for the other. But it has become so much more advanced. It's almost as if we could really just never speak. 



11.) We have our days.
We do. And we get it. "Why are you being so snotty?" "It's just one of those days!" "Oh." Kind of like that.
Then there's always the days where we just need WOMAN TIME. No men. Just women. Organized, slightly chaotic, and loud women.



12.) We are equal part girl.
We have these moments that would make most people think we're lesbians. Like the fact that we get dressed and look at the other and say, "I look like a boy today." We don't like most girls because they are not equal part girl with us. They are more girl than we are. It's bothersome.

13.) We share a love for cats.
I never thought I'd meet someone who loves kitties as much as I do, but I have met my match. 

14.) We share the same style. 
I'm not sure what you'd call it. But it consists of galaxy print, cats, and random objects thrown all over a sweater. It's really exciting.



15.) We share the same humor.
It's one of those that most people sit in silence and give you strange looks while simultaneously wondering if you realize what you've said. Yes, we do. We just thought it was funny. Sor-ry.



16.) We share the same pet peeves.
This one is simple. It means that someone wearing tights as pants can pass us in the mall and we can just look at each other and say, "Ugh."

17.) We share the same ideals.
We know what's right and what's wrong and we hold each other accountable for it. We know when to say, "You're right." 

18.) We know each other.
It's not one of these, "Oh, yeah, I know who she is" things. It's one of those, "I know her TOO well" things. 



19.) We were born to be besties.
Like I said, Aaron is my best friend, but Mac is my bestie. There is a "best friend" difference between boys and girls and husbands and friends. As Christina Yang and Meredith Grey explain it, our husbands/boyfriends are our bestfriends, but we are each other's soul mates. 



If you have a best friend and are female, chances are you understood every single reason. If not, sorry, you're missing out.
I do believe in setting boundaries with your unmarried friends, but if you have to set a lot of boundaries then maybe those friends shouldn't be friends at all. 

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